The in-laws are currently visiting, so I thought I may as well take a week’s vacation (first one since we went to Spain in 2005, I think…) and go somewhere interesting. ‘Interesting’ turned out to be Memphis, Tennessee. “Why Memphis??” everyone here in Houston asked. “Why Memphis??” everyone in Memphis asked. I’d like to think that I went there to visit the “Birthplace of Rock N Roll” (TM) and soak up some of that ol’ blues history, but the truth is that, at 600 miles from Houston, Memphis is about as far as I thought I could take the kids on a road trip.
As it was, we had to break the journey with an overnight stop en-route. This was Texarkana (which I always thought sounded cool, but isn’t) on the way up, and Tyler on the way down. We didn’t see much of Texarkana – stopped in a Walmart (of which there was one in just about every town we passed through – and how some of these towns with a posted population of 800 can justify a ‘supercenter’ is beyond me – probably the same way they can justify having fifteen churches) long enough for the wife to gasp in horror (and fear) at the freakshow that constitutes the local populace, and then headed for the (relative) safety of the motel. Tyler seemed to consist of nothing but hotels and the usual stores/restaurants so I’m not sure why we chose there, other than it being halfway. At least the hotel pool was nice.
Luckily, Memphis had a bit more to offer. Our hotel was a block away from Beale Street, so we spent a fair few of the evenings sat in one of the many bars listening to local blues bands and/or seasoned characters all of whom claimed to be the “King/Queen/Mayor of Beale Street”. The kids really enjoyed it, dancing around much to the amusement of the other clientele. We should have passed a hat round. There’s obviously a lot of blues (Memphis is to blues what New Orleans is to jazz), with Howlin’ Wolf and BB King both being from there, although several of the bar bands leaned heavily on Stevie Ray Vaughan and George Thorogood numbers (both white). Not that I’m complaining – it beats the hell out of the Country & Western that soaks up all of the radio stations we could pick up on the car radio all the way there.
Memphis was the home of Elvis, and it’s pretty much impossible to ignore this, with just about every bar, shop, and restaurant claiming some connection or other, or offering Elvis-themed concoctions or souvenirs. Naturally, we had to take a tour round Graceland (Elvis’s house) which was interesting, although significantly smaller than I imagined, and a lot more ‘homely’ than you’d think – no big chandeliers or leopardskin wallpaper.  The kids were less impressed, with Finn announcing loudly, mid-tour, “Why does everyone care about Elvis? He’s dead. He died on the toilet!” (which sadly wasn’t included on the tour). My playing him Never Loved Elvis by The Wonderstuff must have sunk in…
In-between rainstorms, we took a trip to the invitingly-named Mud Island (matched only by Perth’s Rottnest Island) in the middle of the Mississippi River, which is notable for it’s to-scale model of the entire Mississippi River from Canada to New Orleans, replete with running water that you can wade in (see picture on the MobLog) – which the kids did (and it’s amazing just how much of that water a single diaper can soak up). Spookily, the model’s concrete has crumbled a bit just around the point on Lake Ponchatrain in New Orleans, where the levee broke a few years back. We also took the ‘duck boat’ tour, and a riverboat tour, so we saw a fair bit of the river one way or another. You wouldn’t want to swim in it, though – filthy brown, with several hundred miles of detritus in it by the time it gets to Memphis.
Other than that, we managed a trip to the Sun Studios (very, very small), the Rock ‘n’ Soul Museum, the Children’s Museum (for children, not of children…), the Firefighter’s Museum, and the Zoo. And a trip to the cinema to see the latest Harry Potter film the day it came out (not as good as the previous ones). Plus many of the local cafes and restaurants, as a result of having to eat out three times a day (which can get expensive when there are seven of you…). Highlights would be the Renaissance Cafe (if you like ribs, although the red-beans-and-rice was pretty good), China Chinese restaurant (excellent tofu dishes) and the Bon Ton Cafe (which does a perfect cooked breakfast including the best hash browns this side of Hash Brownsville).
Overall, Memphis is alright, although at least half of the buildings Downtown are derelict and boarded up, which doesn’t make it particularly hospitable. There’s also a lot of panhandlers, drunks, and dodgy-looking people, and (as a result) a heavy police presence. There is just about enough there to keep you busy for a week, but I think if I had the choice again I’d take a couple of days out of the middle to go as far as Nashville, and check out Dollywood.
If nothing else, this vacation has proved that the kids can cope with a long car journey (as long as they have their Nintendo DSes). Maybe next year we’ll try all the way to Florida…
* The song Graceland, from the album Walking the Ghost Back Home, by the excellent ’80s band The Bible, has the lyrics “You will never see Graceland”. Back in the ’80s I never thought I would (or want to), but there you go… And you thought I was being blasphemous!
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